I really, really, really don’t look forward to 18+ months of mindless speculation over Big 11 expansion. The amusing thing is that it doesn’t seem my fellow bloggers from Rutgers or Syracuse are that enthusiastic about the matter either.

I’m a cynic and money always trumps all. And no doubt the money of being part of the Big 11 would be too great for any to turn down.

That said, I like the Big East. Yes, it is not a powerhouse football conference, but it is a better fit for Pitt. That said, if the Big East wants to survive it has to act. Sean at Troy Nunes is right, the Big East has to “Grow a F***ing Pair.” They have to stop acting like a b-ball conference and the whole Providence thing is over.

My feelings on this are much the same as when it went down in 2003. If the Big East is to make it and Pitt be a part of it, then the Big East needs to stop the hybrid crap and commit to being a real frickin’ conference. That means jettisoning the b-ball only schools and get to the magic number of 12 teams that compete in the major sports.

Honestly, I was saving this post until the spring when speculation is easier and there are less interesting things — like a bowl game and basketball games. Then the Big 11 decided it needed more attention.

So here it is.

First, there is no magic bullet.  Admit that there is no frickin’ way the Big East is going to be able to raid other BCS conferences for teams. It is about money and the other BCS conferences make and have more than the Big East. Leaving the ACC by BC and/or Maryland is not going to happen. Grumbling alumni in Boston won’t have BC jumping yet again. Just as Penn State isn’t leaving the Big 11. It’s all about the money.

Second, ignore the independents. Please. Notre Dame is not going to make the full commitment. They just aren’t. Pride and money.

Army and Navy are respectable names, but they are not BCS conference teams. Besides their own desire to play a schedule of their choosing — they don’t compete in other major sports. They don’t have (and nor should they be committing) the resources to a full athletic department budget of a major conference program. So, despite the historic cache and respect for being service academies, they aren’t going to be a part of this.

Third, admit that like after the ACC raid, it will have to be retooling with teams with potential and willingness to make the commitment. They will not make the conference better right away.

Fourth, there has to be some geographic logic and natural rivalries. That means Southern Miss and Tulsa are not in the mix.

Philly. Villanova has to make the leap to D-1A. They need to follow the UConn model. They have been successfull at 1AA, function in a major media market and are smack in the Big East footprint — natural rivalries with Pitt in state and Rutgers right next door. If they aren’t willing, then maybe default to Temple as long as the school is willing to continue to make a full commitment.

Central Florida. Okay, this is a no-brainer. USF may not like the idea of helping them, but they are needed. They have made the commitment to an on-campus stadium. They are in a still growing market (Orlando). They offer USF the natural rival, geographic proximity, and further solidifies the Big East in Florida.

East Carolina. Another, mostly no-brainer. They have a very good fanbase and will be immediately competitive in football. Basketball still needs a lot of work, but they have shown a willingness to make a financial commitment to upgrade on all fronts.

Okay, these are predictable. Right? These have been the ones generally mentioned when it comes to Big East expansion. That means the fourth team is going to be Memphis.

Wrong.

Forget the overall shadiness of Memphis’ athletic programs. Forget that outside of basketball  (and their dance team) that they bring little to a conference. Their geographic isolation from all other programs in the Big East (Louisville is closest and they are nearly 400 miles away) without offering the fertile recruiting of Florida is a real problem. As is further spreading the conference west. They are a choice of last resort.

Now for the 4th team.

Charlotte. You read right. The school formerly called UNC-Charlotte. The University of Charlotte 49ers are bringing back football by 2013. Their ill-fated foray into the A-10 — that has seen the loss of rivalries (geographically isolated with Richmond their closest conference foe) and hurt their basketball program — has them working to expand their athletic department. They provide a natural instate rivalry with ECU and exist in  another growing market along the East Coast.

It’s not ideal. And it sure makes clear why, if the Big 11 reaches its inevitable conclusion of expansion and offers Pitt, Syracuse or Rutgers, they will take it.